Jonathan and I have talked about adopting since we were dating. Looking back on our lives, we both see ways in which God was preparing our hearts through our experiences to lead us to this very moment. For me, my passion for adoption began in my love of other cultures. I began learning Spanish in 8th grade, and I remember wanting God to use my Spanish to make an impact on the world. My experiences translating and using Spanish grew in me a desire to bring another culture into my home one day. Jonathan too had a passion for other nations. With his background in the medical field, he served in AIDS ministries and felt passionate about Africa specifically. Even as we talked about the possibility of adopting early on in our relationship, we didn’t have a time-line in mind.
At about our one-year anniversary, we started really considering when we would want to start the process. Over the summer we started researching. The more we read and learned, the more we began to get excited. As we met with families who have adopted, we began to feel more and more drawn to acting on our desires. Jonathan was the first to be ready to go, but I still had a few worries. We began to pray and look for guidance in scripture. My two greatest fears were finances and the amount of time we would probably be waiting. Since international adoptions have so many uncertainties, I was nervous. I was reminded of the verse, "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." (Phil. 1:6). I have always loved this promise that He will continue to sanctify us until we are complete before Jesus. But this time these words had another dimension to their meaning. I think this verse can refer to the good works He has called us to as well. I thought back on my passions and life experiences and could see God's gentle hand leading me towards adoption. I know with certainty He was calling me to adopt, and this verse gave me the courage to begin now. If He is calling us to something, we can trust that He will carry it out fully.
With my worries over finances, God quickly encouraged me with the resources and support He has surrounded us with. We talked with a few adoptive parents who immediately began telling us about different fundraising ideas, offering to help us wherever needed. We felt welcomed into the adoptive community, even before we officially decided to adopt! I also spoke with an adoptive parent at my church who said,
"Once we were matched to our daughter, I instantaneously did not care how much money I had to save, beg, or borrow. My mindset was-I have a daughter in China and I MUST get her no matter what. If someone kidnapped any of my children and demanded a huge ransom, I would sell everything and do whatever it took to ransom their freedom. Be prepared for this mindset to grip you."
Jonathan and I talked about this and already knew we would feel the same. We have wanted to adopt for so long, and we felt overjoyed that God would bless us with a child. He would take care of all the rest. Jonathan shared with me Matt. 18:5, "And whoever receives one such child in My name receives Me." Jonathan and I talked about how adoption is so close to the heart of God. If we are seeking His will in acting faithfully, He will carry out His plan. So, we decided to move forward in starting our family through adoption!
But the next big decision came when we looked at different countries. If you've ever heard me talk about it, I've wanted to adopt from Latin America or Haiti. Since I lived in the Dominican Republic, I felt like it would make sense to adopt from a country I already had a connection to. But most Latin American countries are either closed to adoption or have difficult requirements, like residency requirements of 6-12 months, age limits of over 35 years, length of marriage of up to 10 years! We then asked ourselves, Do we want to wait ten years to adopt from a country we feel passionate about? Or could we meet a need in another area? We learned quickly that Ethiopia was one of the countries that we not only qualified for, but that also had a large population of adopted children in Nashville. We met with another mom and heard her child's story of how she came to the orphanage, and our hearts broke upon hearing the difficult situations of birth parents in Ethiopia. We learned that in Ethiopian culture they have superstitions about situations like rape, mothers dying in childbirth, teen pregnancies, etc. that lead some people to choose not to parent their children. We couldn't help but want to respond to the need of families for these children. Very quickly, God gave us a passion for Ethiopia, a country and culture we knew nothing about!
With my worries over finances, God quickly encouraged me with the resources and support He has surrounded us with. We talked with a few adoptive parents who immediately began telling us about different fundraising ideas, offering to help us wherever needed. We felt welcomed into the adoptive community, even before we officially decided to adopt! I also spoke with an adoptive parent at my church who said,
"Once we were matched to our daughter, I instantaneously did not care how much money I had to save, beg, or borrow. My mindset was-I have a daughter in China and I MUST get her no matter what. If someone kidnapped any of my children and demanded a huge ransom, I would sell everything and do whatever it took to ransom their freedom. Be prepared for this mindset to grip you."
Jonathan and I talked about this and already knew we would feel the same. We have wanted to adopt for so long, and we felt overjoyed that God would bless us with a child. He would take care of all the rest. Jonathan shared with me Matt. 18:5, "And whoever receives one such child in My name receives Me." Jonathan and I talked about how adoption is so close to the heart of God. If we are seeking His will in acting faithfully, He will carry out His plan. So, we decided to move forward in starting our family through adoption!
But the next big decision came when we looked at different countries. If you've ever heard me talk about it, I've wanted to adopt from Latin America or Haiti. Since I lived in the Dominican Republic, I felt like it would make sense to adopt from a country I already had a connection to. But most Latin American countries are either closed to adoption or have difficult requirements, like residency requirements of 6-12 months, age limits of over 35 years, length of marriage of up to 10 years! We then asked ourselves, Do we want to wait ten years to adopt from a country we feel passionate about? Or could we meet a need in another area? We learned quickly that Ethiopia was one of the countries that we not only qualified for, but that also had a large population of adopted children in Nashville. We met with another mom and heard her child's story of how she came to the orphanage, and our hearts broke upon hearing the difficult situations of birth parents in Ethiopia. We learned that in Ethiopian culture they have superstitions about situations like rape, mothers dying in childbirth, teen pregnancies, etc. that lead some people to choose not to parent their children. We couldn't help but want to respond to the need of families for these children. Very quickly, God gave us a passion for Ethiopia, a country and culture we knew nothing about!
Soon after, we jumped in to the home study process and began interviews, paperwork, and home visits. We then began the Dossier paperwork for the government. We wrote essays, got references, and got page after page notarized at the bank. Finally we got to officially be put on the waiting list! In this period of waiting, we want to invite our family and friends to begin praying and waiting with us. In the meantime, we thought this blog would be a good way to keep everyone updated. We are now taking adoption classes and reading all that we can to better prepare for our future child.
And after writing about our desire to adopt in our Home study, Dossier, and even grant paperwork, I still feel as if I fall short in putting our desire into words! But we are hopeful, excited, and trusting in His timing as we settle in to wait for Him to allow us to be parents through adoption. We can't wait to see what God has in store for our family in the months, years, and lifetime to come! BLESSED.
